I can’t help but notice lately people have been normalizing toxic behaviors within a relationship, and it is disturbing.
Often the catchy little hashtag “couple goals” is written under images on social media that’s highlighting toxic behaviors. People are making bad relationships that are harmful, appear normal.
So much so that people are starting to think this is all normal. That these bad behaviors are what we should not only expect but even want in a relationship. People are conditioned to think that they should accept this as love.
In reality, a toxic relationship can have permanent and horrible ramifications. Leaving you with emotional and lasting scars.
If you want to examine your relationship to see if its toxic here are some of the most common toxic relationship behaviors you should look for.
Jealousy is often looked at endearingly these days. That your partner loves you enough to care that deeply. We are told that jealousy is healthy and shows that we love our partners, but is it really? Sure, we all get that jealous feeling when the person we love chats to an attractive human, but how we deal with it is important. Letting that little silly pang in our gut turn into bad behavior is not ok.
As long as this jealousy doesn’t happen all the time and become an obsessive thing, it should be okay. But if you get angry whenever your partner is nice to another girl or guy, things might be off.
If you’re following them around, snooping in their stuff, and trying to hack their social media accounts, you have a real problem. That kind of behavior is not healthy or cute.
If those feelings of jealousy leave you not allowing your partner any time to themselves you know it has become toxic. Giving your partner time away from you is good for your relationship. You should not be demanding to spend every waking minute together.
That is not affection or love – it is manipulation and possessiveness.
You should be able to share all of your emotions and thoughts with your partner without feeling bad for doing so. All relationships have times when those involved need to sit down and talk about the little things that may be wrong. With communication, everything can be smoothed out.
Some peoples will use these vulnerabilities to blackmail their partners into submission. Instead of talking about problems, they’re throwing accusations and spiteful comments.
If your partner is doing this to you they are not good for you, Instead of taking these moments to connect and grow they are punishing you for being open.
Couples have to talk about everything, even the dark, and negative things, without fear of emotional blackmail or manipulation.
Having a relationship is not about keeping track of who was wrong and who was right. The beauty of a healthy relationship is that the scale will always rise and fall. Evening things out for sharing a life together.
If you or your partner wants to keep score of your relationship, it has become a competition. At this point, it’s no longer a loving relationship but a way to see who can be right more than the other person.
Playing these ‘tit-for-tat’ games and getting even for losing an argument or fight is not going to help your relationship.
Your life will be full of bitterness if you have this toxic approach to relationships and love.
Clear and honest communication is one of the most important factors in a healthy relationship. By dropping hints and not talking about things that bug you, you are suffocating your romance.
You need to be open to discussions if your partner doesn’t feel happy about things. And your partner must be the same as you. Direct and honest is the only way things will truly work.
If you don’t have clear communication lines, your relationship will not last and for as long as it does, no one will truly be happy or fulfilled.
The Blame Game
One of the most toxic behaviors in a relationship is playing the blame game. If you’ve had a bad day or week, there’s no need to find reasons to blame your partner.
This will hurt them as well as your relationship. Blaming other people for how you feel and how life’s treating you is childish and selfish.
Suppressed emotions are not a good thing either, so talk to someone and vent before you explode and ruin something that could have been beautiful.
Don’t go around finding fault with your partner and making them feel guilty for how you are feeling.
If you have seen any of this behavior in your relationship, you need to sit down and think. Are you guilty of this behavior? Is your partner guilty? Just because you’ve exhibited toxic behavior does not mean you should just end your relationship.
Instead, talk to your partner and work on improving things. If you can’t, then it’s time to think about cutting ties and moving on.