When we hear the words resting bitch face, we automatically think of the mean, moody women who look at others as if they were something they would rather not see. You have no idea what thoughts are going through her head as her face is basically expressionless.
It’s actually a natural state of her face and in this case mine, but to those that don’t know me they can’t work out if I’m annoyed, angry. irritated, frustrated or mad.
Of course, I feel things you just don’t see it, and I know it puts people off me, and to be perfectly honest my resting bitch face (RBF) has saved me from having to associate with some people who would just irritate the fuck out of me anyway.
My husband saw through my RBF and saw me for me. He wasn’t put off by my face, he said it made him want to get to know me and he said it is one of the things he loves about me.
This is what he told me he saw in me.
1. I’m mysterious.
He told me that at first, I puzzled him, yet drew him to me at the same time. He knew I was going to be a challenge and he was always up for a challenge. He liked that he couldn’t predict what I would say or do and it just made him want me more. Who knew my face could invoke all that in a man?
2. When he got to know me better, he knew I loved him behind my RBF.
He knew that the way I displayed my emotions would be different from every other woman he had been involved with. Yes, I do cry, laugh, smile just not as much as other women do, so when those emotions are displayed, he said he knew they were genuine. He loves the intensity of the woman I am.
3. I’m not mad at you. I just look like I am.
I may appear like I am permanently mad about something but I’m not. If I’m mad at you for something I will be upfront and tell you. The first time I got mad at my husband and said so, he went quiet and said ‘Shit really I thought you always looked like that’ then laughed, it broke the tension but he also knew when I was mad, he would know it with bells on.
4. His friends told him I was a weirdo bitch.
He told me the first time one of his friends said that he wanted to punch them but didn’t. What he did say is that they had no idea who I was as they hadn’t bothered to even try and get to know me, he told them ‘you’re intimidated by her, and that’s fine with me, but try knowing her before you speak her name in future’. My hero!
5. He felt proud when he saw he could brighten my day.
Yes, I was a challenge for him every day, truth be told I still am even though he knows me inside and out. He set himself a task of making me smile at least once a day, the mans a masochist what can I say. But he achieved it and still does and seeing him with our children is one sure way to make my heart melt and my face to crack a smile.
6. He knew I wasn’t fake.
He liked that about me. He knew I was always staying true to myself. That I am independent in my thinking and how I behave. I am no people pleaser. I have standards and strong opinions and if I don’t agree with something, I show it and I say so. So yeah, I’m not one to keep the peace either, but he does an awesome job of that.
7. RBF is my defence mechanism.
My face is my defence, it’s my boundary without even trying. People take one look at me and think ‘fuck I’m not messing with her’. I don’t care to be honest. If I like you and want you in my circle my defences go down and you get to know me. I’m very good at reading people and for some that is something that just will not do, they don’t like that I can see through their fake behavior, it’s like I’m a threat.
I love my husband deeply, and I show him in ways that don’t always need a smile or laughter, it’s in the little things I do for him and our family. Besides smiling gives you wrinkles; a resting bitch face keeps the wrinkles away.